Free to be a Woman with Sarra Adnani

TUCP Intro/Outro: 00:00:08

Welcome to The Ultimate Coach Podcast conversations from being inspired by the book The Ultimate coach written by Amy Hardison, and Alan Thompson. Join us each week with the intention of expanding your state of being, and your experience will be remarkable. Remember, this is a podcast about be. It is a podcast about you. To explore more deeply visit the ultimatecoachbook.com. Now, enjoy today's conversation from being

Ross Weitzer: 00:00:48

All right, hello, hello to whoever is on the other side of this listening. My name is Ross Weitzer and I want to introduce you welcome you to the ultimate podcast conversations from being. Now I have a wonderful guest today to be in presence with me her name is Sarra Adnani. The magnificent personal and business coach. Sarah Hello. Hello today.

Sarra Adnani: 00:01:17

Hey, Ross. So nice to be here with you.

Ross Weitzer: 00:01:20

Yeah, it' so nice as well. Such a pleasure to meet you.

Sarra Adnani: 00:01:22

Same here. It's amazing. I'm In Miami all the way in South Africa. Oh, awesome.

Ross Weitzer: 00:01:28

Yeah. How special to be able to connect from such a far distance.

Sarra Adnani: 00:01:32

I know. Yes. Be so close on here. It's so connected. Absolutely.

Ross Weitzer: 00:01:37

So Sarah, the reason that we are here today and I invited you to be in this conversation with me is one to get to know each other experience each other in just being with each other and kind of learning about how the ultimate coach has the book has really impacted us and just created a shift in our being. And I wanted to reach out with you specifically just because of my own observation from afar of seeing how the book and just being has been so present in your life. And I'm really curious to just start this off by asking you since reading the book, what major shifts have you experienced and discovered within yourself?

Sarra Adnani: 00:02:15

Oh, wow. They've been so many major transformations since reading the book. And I'm rereading the book. The first time I read the book was in August, I got the manuscript from Steve. And then I started reading it again when it came out. And then recently, I don't know if you saw on the ultimate face estimate coach Facebook page where they've asked us all to sign the book. As if it was ours, it just kind of like hit me differently. They've been major, major transformations they happen every day. The main ones is my level of awareness has increased significantly. I am loving awareness means a whole new different things to me. You know, Ram Dass says says I'm a loving awareness. One of Steve's declarations as I'm loving awareness. And I've always understood it and kind of connected to it. But recently, you really, really, really sat with me in such a deep way that I can so feel it in my be. It's kind of like zooming out thing where I'm just loving awareness and watching whatever is happening within this avatar, which is my body or my nervous system. And clearly seeing it and seeing which path and which road the thoughts are trying to take me on. And watching that with. I was aware before noticing what's happening within me. But I would judge it and I will try and escape from it. I know try and get rid of it. I know try to understand what did they do wrong? It's my fault. No shame me. And this new understanding now is more of okay, there's little bit of anger. There's a little bit of sadness. So there's a little bit of frustration or whatever it is going on. And it's okay. And I'm watching it with loving awareness. So not just awareness before, I guess before it was awareness. I know it's really loving awareness like loving myself, no matter what's happening inside it actually happened this morning. I couldn't sleep last night for whatever reason. And so I only slept like two or three hours. So woke up a little you know, when you don't sleep you just wake up tired, you know, Lin frustrated and not fully recovered arrested for Right. And I woke up, my alarm went off, and I woke up that way, and my dogs are like, starting to play. And I noticed myself getting frustrated, like, Oh, I gotta take them to the park, I'm tired, you know, should sleep a little more. And then immediately, this is the power of this book. And this power, the transformations that happened through this book. Immediately I dropped into my body. Right? So I mean, my brain, my mind, immediately I dropped into my body, like, it's okay, Sarah didn't sleep much to catch feel like this, no big deal. And it just faded away. You know, it completely disappeared, I get up went to the park, I was happy. You know, okay, didn't sleep, it's okay. No big deal. You feel whatever you feel it's okay. You know, just stay here in your body, don't try to go anywhere else, don't try and figure it out. Don't try to understand why they'll try and shame yourself. Just just be here, be here in the body. And the minute, I was loving awareness to like that, you know, it's like, it's like I made love to myself. I don't know if that makes sense. But like, it's that meeting of the self set of that resistance. Just like that meeting that making love in that union. And it's just been so beautiful, to fall in love. Like that with myself. So I signed the book. I don't know if this is this one, because I have like, few of them laying around. I give them out all the time. But I signed it as loving myself, no matter what. And that's exactly what that means no matter what happens. No matter what thoughts I've taken me on, I'm gonna love myself. I'm not doing anything wrong. There's nothing. So good. So I'll allow. So that's, that's right. That's my biggest transformation. That's I call that the union of the fusion race. That softness, I mean, the feminine quality of God. What

Ross Weitzer: 00:07:20

resonates with me is two significant points that I'm taking away from it is

Sarra Adnani: 00:07:27

when you're mentioning,

Ross Weitzer: 00:07:30

loving awareness and how, in rediscovering it through the ultimate coach, it had this deeper depth of meaning for you. And for me, what occurred was, is I often think about, there's learning intellectually, it's like, Okay, I've learned about this mantra from rom Das, I'm loving awareness. And then there's actually having the experience of being that mantra. And for me, that's what occurred through reading, the ultimate coach is that I went from previously having this intellectual understanding of being to oh my god, I'm actually experiencing being. And that is what was so magical about the book for me. I was like, I've never experienced a book this way, where I'm so knowing now of what being means. And I'm so knowing now, because I'm having the literal experience of being connected to my being, and observing how I can shift my being. And what I love you What I love that you said was this, this, like, you said it wonderfully, this like, graceful union with the self. And I experienced that literally, with you. And what I mean is, I felt at the beginning of the start of this podcast, right, this is my first time doing a podcast, and I just felt those jitters and those nerves. And all of a sudden, I'm sitting in the seat of awareness, hearing the first like, 30 seconds, like, I'm like, the introduction to this episode. And I'm like, Oh, my God, I don't feel like myself. I don't I don't feel like I'm being me, I don't feel authentic. And in the past, instead of having that awareness in the past, I would then add a layer of judgment on top of it. And it's that layer of judgment on top of it, where I would then feel the shame and I would feel low self worth. But like you were mentioning that that graceful union of the self is I saw it and that was it. I was able to leave it there. I didn't have to shift my being from okay, I'm experiencing inauthenticity, but that doesn't mean I am in authentic and because that was able to be authentic, I was able to just let that go. And that right there was, was a big shift for me in reading the ultimate coach is that like, I am experiencing I am and no longer needing to think it or believe I know it.

Sarra Adnani: 00:10:17

Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Like you were saying the intellectual is one thing. And the experience thing. And I, you know, we started this conversation, I see the shift, right. And like, it's, it takes, you know, I know that about podcast, where am I going to say, and then immediately, as you take the seat of the self, and watch it, unfold it, like, does what it needs to do for you, without you thinking about it. And that authenticity you're talking about, it's so beautiful to experience, and to also watch someone experience it. And, you know, I realized a lot of what we do is like, we intellectualize things, and we try and go from here, meaning the brain to the body. And it doesn't work that way. The way it works is from the heart from the body up. So the heart of the body, watches witnesses, and tells the brain where to go. But most of us do the opposite. We use the brain to control everything. So the brain becomes the master of the body and of our lives. And so we have it opposite the way it's supposed to go. And we make it so much harder when we try and do it that way. As we go in, it's like you're going the wrong way, you know, you're going into rock on a road and says wrong way, make a U turn. It's one of those, you know, it has to come from here from the body, from the heart and up. And what I I know it's hard for us as humans, because a lot of our traumas, a lot of things we go through a lot of stories we pick up scarcities stays in our nervous system and our bodies, a lot of us both adapt. A way of being that is this association, right? We escape the body because it gets painful. We learned to do that from a young age. So we just started realizing, right. So when you tell people come back to your body, it's hard. A lot of people go into that place is a lot of pain in there that I need to process. So it's hard for me to do that. That's why Steve talks about frosting. On top of who I can't get experience, what we experienced in now without doing the work. Meaning without coming back to your body and removing those layers and looking at the hook in there. No, I, I understand I'm loving awareness from a long time. But I've been doing a lot of work, a lot of deep, deep work has been lot of judgments that I had to look at a lot of traumas that I had to relive and transform for me to finally be able, it's like it's like doing this right getting rid of all those traumas to finally clear the way take the seat of the South. Otherwise, what I was doing before is I am loving awareness. He was on top of right, he wasn't sitting anywhere in my body because there was a lot of things that needed to be removed first, you know,

Sarra Adnani: 00:13:53

stories I picked up on stories, I was telling myself from whatever I had, whatever happens throughout my life, I had a lot of abandonment issues. I had to take her out. I have a lot of a lot of just a lot of traumas, you know, a lot of stories, a lot of names, a lot of suffering, that look at it. Right, right, my own judgments and be like well, okay, well, let's look at the story. What, what really happened was like going back and holding that little girl's hand and saying, Okay, what happened here? Sit in with her in that pain to see it again. And from that place, change the story. You can I can just tell her Oh, no, no, that didn't happen. I can gaslight her you know, I can't be like, Okay, I haven't looked at him. I'm going to just move on. Forget about it. It's more of like, okay, it's holding that space for her sitting there seeing it, and then transformative. And then bringing her with me. So that next time I say I am Oh For one of my declaration, so I am free. I am free to be I am free to create. I am free to be woman. We say that together, you know, before I would say or was an affirmation not a ratio, I would say an affirmation. And she's there like, no, lie. You're not. You're not I'm just kind of like we're doing this. And it's in I hear her saying that I'm like, Okay, I'm just gonna say it. And we're gonna continue saying until, until I believe it out intellectually. Yeah. But it still starts off by going through the poop. Like Steve talks about cleaning that cleaning that mess. Now we say it together in union. And I say I'm free to be, I'm free to be woman. And she's like cattle? Yes. You know, versus no, you're not. And so it's an ongoing union with Me and all these parts that were in pain, like going back, talking to them, bringing them up, and you're like, okay, cool, we're doing this together, versus a fragment itself, trying to force anything on all these parts of me. And so they're all against me. And it's like a war in sight, you know, it's also what I call the brain against the hearts. So now it's, you know, in yoga, spirituality will come in alignment, mind, body, and spirits. And that's what the book has been able to do. It's really freeing the mind, body, and spirit. It's like, one of the

Ross Weitzer: 00:16:45

interesting pieces that I picked up in there is, when we were talking about the mantra, I am loving awareness. Before when it was just a sentence that wasn't having this deep inner shift. And today, where it has this whole new world of meaning and experience, what I think is a possibility is that before having that shift through reading the book, the mantra was all in the mind. It was just another thought being repeated. And through the book, the mantra shifted into being something that was like the body was also communicating. So all of a sudden, I am loving awareness, there is now coherence, where it's the body and the mind are communicating it as one.

Sarra Adnani: 00:17:36

Yeah, absolutely. It's where I'm coming from now. Right? It's a state of being meaning where I'm coming from, it's not just a thought. I am loving awareness is, is, it's just that where I'm coming from. And you know, that's what I was actually just coaching on that, where you're coming from, and I don't mean the country, you know, meaning you're being Steve talks about what you do, doing. Sounds from your VA. So where are you coming from? Coming from? So I am a loving awareness is what I'm coming from. Because I'm coming from that. For me, I'm also doing that for you, for everyone else, right? So whatever you say, right now, because I'm coming from unloving awareness. It's, I'd be loving awareness, I'd be, you know, that loving witness towards. So we're to choose the opposite of judgments.

Ross Weitzer: 00:18:41

And imagine a previous reality where I am loving awareness coming from judgment wouldn't work out so well. Right? Yeah. And it's that inner work of saying, Yeah, I'm loving awareness. And I'm also being with those judgments. And it's by being with those judgments that I'm able to transform them into love and now come from loving awareness. Whereas previously, if I'm avoiding the work, avoiding the shit, I'm just repeating, I am loving awareness, but the judgment is still my operating system.

Sarra Adnani: 00:19:21

Because it's deeply rooted. Yeah. Because I'm because I'm shaming the judgments. Right? I am shaming that little girl, or teenager, or young lady for those judgments or those thoughts for that story. She created for herself out of protection. Right out of tried to look out for me. See, so it's kind of, well, I did that before us because we were in danger. And now you're shaming me for doing that. So it's looking at that on her with loving awareness more of like, okay, thank you, I love you. And she decides to change the story automatic just because I need her we'd love. Again, it's taking seated self simply love it with this to whatever is going on inside. And it's all good. It's all good, whatever judgment comes up, it's okay. Whatever, you know, whatever thought comes up, it's okay. It's just that it's just a thought. It's just a protective mechanism. It's just nothing. None of those judgments were created out of trying to hurt is always been protection. That's the truth. So why would I judge? Punishment shame? I think

Ross Weitzer: 00:21:08

such an important conversation around judgment is the misunderstanding and misinterpretation of the conditioning of don't judge others? Because when we grow up and we adopt that line, don't judge others. Oftentimes, the misunderstanding is, oh, right now I am judging, I shouldn't judge others. So then I'm critical of my judgment. So it's like the judgment, I'm already going to feel shame. Now my conditioning says I shouldn't do that. So then I'm going to tell myself bad Ross, more shame on top of that. And the shift is, don't judge others is an ideal of saying, I would love to live that way. So when I do find myself judging, I can drop it realize I don't need it. And I can live without it.

Sarra Adnani: 00:22:06

You know, maybe instead of don't judge others is it happens that we judge because we're humans. And when you catch yourself doing that, forgive yourself and move on. Right? They have happens, judgment happens. Just be aware of it. And drop it. If you said, you know, don't hold on to it. Exactly that thing is, so that we judge is that we shame ourselves judging, it's not the feeling is the feeling on top of the field, which is shame. Shame is such me shame is the mother of all, I don't want to call it negative. It is that energies, right? Shame is just that shame. It's another emotion that we have. But if we get stuck with it, He isolates us. It puts us in a corner. with shame. We don't talk about our experiences. We hide. We don't allow ourselves to be vulnerable. We send our heads, bad Ross or bad Sarah, you know, and it's just, we don't. It's such an isolating state of being to be there. And the minute we were like, oh, okay, I do this, I shame myself and that's okay. See, not even judging the shame. Okay, that's okay. Now I'm going to talk about it and be vulnerable. And allow me to love me for just what just happened, it was an experience, then we come out of the the isolating dark place into the lights. And we allow everything, we just allow it to be whatever it is, we're just allowed to be.

Ross Weitzer: 00:24:08

I'm curious in regards to experiencing shame. Just regards to like shifting your being and regards to vulnerability what what's currently going on in your life. What is an area of focus where a lot of your attention on shifting is occurring?

Sarra Adnani: 00:24:29

Well, I just had a major shift that I'm integrating currently, which is around trying to save my mother so I was I was in Hawaii recently as part of the ultimate placation. Fortress a retreat that Jeff Goodman invited us to a Um, the readers of the book. So I think it was about 10 of us. And I had this major, you know, I, for us women, I don't know how it is for men, and I can't say this is just for women and not for men, but I'm just going to speak about women because it's why I'm, so I always speak about my experience. But for me, and as a woman shame is, is a very interesting and deep topic, in terms of a lot of things, you can do this, or you can do that because your girl or your woman if you a lot of things, you know, that I was carrying around being a woman we get shit, you know, someone gets if a woman gets raped, I'll shoot because she was dressed a certain way she attracted that kind of attention. If a woman is looking pretty or taking care of herself, while she's looking for attention. If, if a woman is smart, she's too smart. For women is success successful, she's trying to be a man, if you know, it's it's a lot of heavy things of like, then who should Who am I or then what is allowed for me, you know, because there's a lot of shame around anything around the body around your brains around having children around, being a housewife around, you know, everything is, turns a little harder. And I'm not saying this to victimize, but it just creates a lot of a lot of shame. You know, as I've been molested as a child, and I've escaped rape. And I've gotten those answers of what did you do? You know, and I'm like, What do you mean? What did I do? You know, I was six. How can that? How, you know, shame is, you, it's your fault. That's why shame does. And so I had to do a lot of work around that wasn't my fault. And when I felt so ashamed that I had to, I felt that I had to deny or suppress, or hide my feminine side. Because being feminine or being in my feminine, puts me in danger, am I get raped, I might be looked at it as just as an object, I might not be taken seriously. I mean, you know, all these things. And I believe those stories. Because I was shamed for getting hurt. So that's, that's, that's a part that I've healed that still, sometimes I would notice that I feel like I have to withdraw because I'm, maybe I'm being too sexy. Or maybe I'm attracting some sort of attention, I shouldn't be attracted. Or if I allow my this, me to just flow this way, fully my feminine, then I'm going to take me seriously, I'm trying to do business. I'm an entrepreneur, you know, this is a world of men. I, you know, so that's something that I still remind myself of, with loving awareness now. That it is one of my declaration is I am a beautiful, sexy, feminine, smart woman. And I can be all those things, and I give myself permission to be all those things. And yes, there are men out there who would try and take advantage. But it doesn't mean I need to hide. It's not on me to hide, or try and suppress any of that. So, so it's a constant reminder, because that protective mechanism happened yesterday at the gym. You know,

Sarra Adnani: 00:29:24

I was I was in the same room and you know, I felt that, you know, there was a guy there and I felt that automatic protection. I had to protect myself. And then I was like, Oh, I can I can just relax and might be in and be who I am and it doesn't mean I'm opening the door for this man. If he takes it this way. I'm just gonna say no, thank you. Which is exactly what happened. No, but no, thank you. I'm saving some time to meditate here at this table. Okay, just have some space. But before we get defensive and, you know, take on my masculine to protect me it or leave the room. And yesterday, it was a beautiful moment because I noticed the whole thing. And I was like, oh, Sarah, you're safe. Stay here, send your feminine and just say no, thank you, you're safe. I think it's gonna happen. And it's and that's what I did. So the transformations to the book happened. The colorations are very helpful. And it's a constant practice. It's not like you read this book, and yet it's transformations. And now you do that or not. It's even Steve, Steve LIS histories, declarations, I don't know how many times a day, you have to constantly to practice you have to constantly remind yourself because you will constantly be put in situations where that you might default back. And it's all good. It's all good. It's just a protection mechanisms. So even when you so this is that the loving awareness when you just notice that that's happening. With loving awareness, I see that I'm shifting back to this protection mechanism. And it's okay, thank you, I love you, I see it. And just with that loving awareness, and a declaration, you shift back automatically always happens here. It's all here in the body. It's not my slides, lecture, sevens

Ross Weitzer: 00:31:22

slow. And you're not making it a problem to be solved.

Sarra Adnani: 00:31:27

No, it's not a problem to be solved. Again, it's it's action mechanism. Strive to help. This is nothing to be fixed, it's more of staying. Staying in that union with myself. It's with loving awareness. Right loving awareness is I'm not shaming myself for having this reaction right now for the fault in bad. It's okay. From that place of love, I say my declaration. I choose where to come from. And where I want to come from do is I want to stay in my feminine. And I want to say my natural states.

Ross Weitzer: 00:32:17

Yeah, it sounds like the rate because of the way that you view the circumstances. The reaction in itself is love loving you. Because the reaction is just a reflection of hey, because of who you are and how you're going to approach this right now you're actually going to love yourself even

Sarra Adnani: 00:32:39

more. So you know, we talk about self love a lot and taste in it is a whole different it's a whole different experience. intellectualizing self love, I am love I am. I've never done affirmations really, because I

Sarra Adnani: 00:33:12

just didn't. I didn't believe that. They worked. That didn't for me, maybe they didn't work because I didn't believe it, or whatever. But I I always thought there was a missing piece. Clear in the pool was that when you clear the pool, you taste loving yourself. It's like it's, I can't put it into words. I don't think even lots of love does it justice to this feeling this unit back and it's hard to explain it's hard to put into words deep experience,

Ross Weitzer: 00:33:54

what is the distinction for you between affirmations and declarations?

Sarra Adnani: 00:34:02

So, affirmations is putting on a YouTube video where they say I am for an hour I am love, I am peace I am. I am great. I am abundance, I am making money, which is great. That colorations are what your souls declarations are looking at your judgments, forgiving yourself for those judgments and allowing your soul to sell you who you are. As opposite to those church. They're not like literally the opposite. So if your judgment is people don't love me. That's doesn't necessarily mean that declaration that's gonna come out of you as people love. So it's not a direct opposite in words. But it's this statement that comes out of your soul that is uniquely true to you, I can give you my declarations. And you if you listen to them, they will be affirmations to you.

Ross Weitzer: 00:35:10

Before you do that, can you can you describe the creation process of one of your declarations?

Sarra Adnani: 00:35:19

So, you know, we were talking about the challenges and suffering I've gone through with being a woman because of shame and sexual molestation, raping and all of that. So the judgments were, I have my feminine, my feminine hurts. I am not allowed to be in my family, I'm not allowed to be a woman. Being a woman is scary. Being being men have more worse than women. Men are more safe than women. Men are better than men come first. You know, because he gets you like, if he did this, to me, it's my fault. He's a man of course, he has urges, and I need to die. So not to not to instigate these urges in to see how much judgment in their pages ah, on how painful it was for me to accept that the feminine is powerful, because I got I got hurt over and over and over because of that. So and this takes a long time, you know, right, it's judgment sitting with them. Remembering these unliving again, this sexual molestation is living again, this right we live in again, this, you know, it's really painful being there again, in those places, dealing with them and looking at them. And those judgments of you can't do can't do this, you can't do that. It's not always allowed. This girl's not allowed that so stages judgments. And then I had to go through each one of them and forget myself, forgive myself for having those judgments and forgive anybody who's reinforced those judgments on me, which took a while. So I forgive myself, forgive myself, I forgive myself. It's like repenting, you know, that's what God talks about. And then, after it myself, like, I create that space, in the surrender of the forgiveness, disappearing of the shame, and hid in that place of complete surrender, great grace shows up. And Grace opens that door for my soul to speak. So after this forgiveness, forgive, forgive, forgive, forgive. It's like you were in a clearing and cheering and then emerge as your soul emerges and tells you who you are. have forgiven, forgiven forgive, I know I am. And it comes to you. It doesn't come to you from your head, it comes to you from your soul. So we came it was, I am free to be, I am free to create. I am free to be woman, however I choose to do and when I say that, I've goosebumps over my body because I feel so true. It's a liberation. It's a truth. It's a union. When I say an affirmation of just one that doesn't belong to me, I am a strong woman. Okay. Doesn't doesn't mean anything to me. It's a great statement. It's a beautiful statement. It just doesn't say anything to me. Versus when I say I am free, I am free to be. I am free to create i afraid to be woman. However, I choose to be woman. It makes me smile. No. That's what that

Ross Weitzer: 00:39:21

thank you for taking me through that process. It's the power in that is you gave me you gave a listener the experience of here's an affirmation, here's a declaration and to observe you light up and witness an entire shift in how you're relating to yourself. Like, you look like a free little girl. Where your past no longer exists.

Sarra Adnani: 00:39:51

It's so beautiful to see and be in

Ross Weitzer: 00:39:57

the power in the process that you described is because of that. The process what's coming out of your mouth can only be truth

Sarra Adnani: 00:40:05

to me. Right? It's again, it starts with that loving awareness, I would not have happened by shaming. And you know when to add something to that is when you're right, those judgments on you look at yourself, you look at those judgments, it's difficult process because they are, your brain will come up with plenty of reasons as to why you need to believe that judge. You know, your brain in my mind for me like it's for this one case, my brain is telling me, we you got molested? What are you talking about? Do you want to go there again, really, you want to allow yourself to just be really a woman dressed this way and look this way? And you know, you? Are you crazy? Do you do not remember what happened to us? I was very traumatic. Do you not remember that guy pitting you against the wall? You know, and it's there. It's that it happened. And it sucked. And it sitting there gracefully with that story? Yes, it happened. And yes, Simon really did. And that's not what I'm debating. Yes, he happened. The story that I created, the meaning that I attached to it. Is what a question in here. Does that mean? I have to hide me as a woman. Does that mean? I am not allowed to dress the way I want? Or look the way I want. Does that mean? I can't go to the beach and wear bikini. Does that mean? I can be sexy? Does that mean? You know it's that meaning associated with that happened? That that needs to be questioned. And that's where the shift happens. Okay, well, yeah, that happened. Yes, their brain that happened. And we suck. And thank you, and I love you for trying to protect, can we find a different meaning in here to this? Is it maybe the guy did what he did? Not because of me? Could that also be true? Yeah, that could also be true. Okay. So I find a lot that we get stuck in the meaning. It's not we confuse what happened for a meaning we associate with it. Yes, they happen. Yes, this sucked. And it doesn't have to mean that. Because that story is where we get stuck. That's That's how a limiting belief is more from the meaning we assign to what happens to us.

Ross Weitzer: 00:42:59

The impact is no longer in control of view. You're now in charge of the impact.

Sarra Adnani: 00:43:11

Right? Yes, the impacts no longer because the story I made it has been dissolved. And the truth came up. But that's union. That's me finding me again. And that that's the expense self love that I was talking about earlier, that allow enough. I'm allowed to be who I am. Again.

Ross Weitzer: 00:43:39

What would you say to somebody? Well, we could start with your younger self, what would you say to your younger self in order to guide her to this right here? So that you could have saved however many years to becoming this realization?

Sarra Adnani: 00:44:00

You know, the truth what's coming up for me is I don't know that there's anything I could have said or done. To, not to save me years. As a child, you don't even realize you're not conscious enough to realize why your body and your brain you're not even your I don't think you can. The only thing I would have encouraged myself. co2 is what others actually seeing is however you feel is okay. The non shaming parts, you know, like you were saying earlier, don't judge the feeling. I would have whatever I would have to, you know, because when we're children we see we see, oh, what a parent sees a child crying, they try and make it better right away. What can I do to make it better? What can I do to stop them cry from crying? What can I do to stop them from feeling this way? It's almost like saying it's not okay to feel the way you feel. Instead of holding space, it's okay to feel this way. So I would have told her, it's okay to feel this way. I don't know that she would have been able to tell me the story she has created in her head for me to be able to, I would have just the words, feel this way, I wouldn't have shamed her, I would have said, it's your fault. This happened. You know, I would say, Yeah, I would. I also imagine,

Ross Weitzer: 00:45:37

besides that, along with the doing of the communication, being with her in love, because I can imagine how many people were with you. And internally coming from a place of fear, coming from a place of concern, coming from a place of control. And they can say, whatever they say, but are they actually embodying and being with you in the presence of what you're experiencing? Because by a human not being in the present, with you, now, there's just even more separation occurring. And the child doesn't know that that separation is even occurring?

Sarra Adnani: 00:46:21

Yeah. It's, uh, you know, hurt people hurt people. And the people who have done their work, don't know how to do the work for you. During this process for me, because I had to forgive them to What do you mean, I was in this house with all these people in this habit, you know, where, what? So that has the right, I gotta protect myself, because no one's gonna protect me, as one of the stories I created. Right? At that age, if this happened, there are five people in this house. This, that means I'm not safe. That means I gotta, I gotta look out for myself. You know, so more of the masculine, less of the feminine, even more reinforced. So, in forgiving them, you know, Byron, Katie says this, everybody does the best they can with the thinking they have in the moment. So this has helped me a lot with forgiving other people. I don't believe anybody is trying to hurt anybody. Because they want. I believe if anybody is causing pain or suffering, it's because they don't know better. They do it better than they have currently. They're hurting themselves. They're going with the old pain, suffering. It doesn't mean I just sit there and take it. I understand. And I established my own paths, right. But it's helped me a lot to see understanding that no one is trying to hurt you. Because they won't, oh, no one did protect you. Because it's not like they saw this happen. And they're like, oh, yeah, that's just that happened. Let it happen. Right. They didn't see it. So the forgiveness of other people is also really important in this process. Understanding that nobody is inherently bad. You know, Steve talks about seeing the goal the people. And for me out of it meets that standard that everybody's doing the best they can. And he allows with forgiveness. It allows to generate love within you instead of generating judgment, the more you judge it, right, Steve was talking about that, when you're judging someone, it's that energy has to come through you first. So you have to feel it first. So you're hurting yourself first. So love it, awareness, then we'll come back to that allows to generate sensation. I think

Ross Weitzer: 00:48:57

I see forgiveness in a I don't know if it's a different way or just a unique way is that in the context of what you were sharing is use your energy to love yourself as opposed to use your energy

Sarra Adnani: 00:49:14

to hate the other.

Ross Weitzer: 00:49:16

And the only way to use your energy to love yourself when there is another is to forgive them. And that's kind of what what creates the union right there is you can't love yourself and have resentment and anger towards another because that's where your energy is getting leaked.

Sarra Adnani: 00:49:38

And going. Yeah, they can both exist at the same time. Absolute.

Ross Weitzer: 00:49:46

So Sarah, to come to a close here.

Sarra Adnani: 00:49:50

I think it's been

Ross Weitzer: 00:49:53

I'm grateful that you have invited me into your story and allowed me to hear it and Be a part of its exploration. And we heard the beginning of the story, we heard the growth in responding and shifting and changing the story and who you are today. What do you see as the next phase of this story? The next chapter after this powerful shift and being

Sarra Adnani: 00:50:23

practice, continuously practicing the declarations, the love and awareness, the making forgiveness, front and center, making it practicing all these things. Because it's not they don't be like I was saying, it's not like, oh, that's already happened. And then you move on. It's all practice everything. You know, in spirituality, even religion, you know, and all religions mean, well, all of them have practices. Because we are as humans, we are designed to forget. And we there are practices for all of them. Yoga is a practice, right, like so. I have over 1500 hour training as a yoga teacher, I can do some amazing posts. But Yoga is a practice it's not about reaching the poles. It's not about like, showing up okay, me I could sound my head. But it's about constantly practicing because each pose has something to tell you every every breath with each pose reminds you of something reminds you that union yoga means union. In religions, you know, like we pray, you know, like, right constant prayer is a practice to for union union with the self which is God right? The self is God. Every everything out every wisdom out there that was gained from a Prophet from the sage from Buddha from whatever they it's all about practice. Meditation is a practice, right? It's not like you practice, you meditate for bed, and then you're like, Okay, now I get it, and then you, you stop, you stop meditating, the, the noise comes back, it's cleaning, right? You start cleaning your house, it's gonna get dirty, you stop going to the gym, you're gonna get upset again. You stop eating healthy, you're gonna gain weight. It's, for me, everything is in practice. It's good job is a ha moments and shifts. But maintaining them is about practice, all the time. So whatever practice you choose, practices, it's not it's not a destination. It's a journey. So for me, what's next is making sure continue to practice my declarations, I continue to practice yoga, continuing to go to the gym and continue to meditate, I continue to do these things, as if my life depends on them, because it does. And whatever happens next, whatever life throws at me, is all good. As long as I practice,

Ross Weitzer: 00:53:05

what's amazing to me about

Sarra Adnani: 00:53:09

your answer.

Ross Weitzer: 00:53:12

There wasn't even a mention about a destination or where you want to go. It's because you already have all the knowing that as long as you just stay consistent, and show up aligned and practice, something awesome is gonna come. Right. There's so much trust that if I just keep doing this, my life's gonna get better. And I'm already loving it now. So why would I do anything but continue to show up as I show up? Right? Is that, sir?

Sarra Adnani: 00:53:43

Thank you. Thank you, Ross. It's that commitment to the practice. Commitment is the masculine side of God. Right? The commitment, integrity, right? The grace and the loving awareness, that feminine part of God, so I'm committed to my feminine. That's the union of the masculine, the feminine the union of me, and we believe in me and God. It's such love.

Ross Weitzer: 00:54:12

Thank you, Sarah, for portraying your message. Not through words, but just truly how I'm experiencing you showing up on this call.

Sarra Adnani: 00:54:23

Thank you, Ross. Thank you for having me. Thank you all and stays. Thank you for doing this podcast. Thank you for your ownership. Thank you for acknowledging,

Ross Weitzer: 00:54:33

did we have the ultimate conversation or what? Definitely. Sarah, thank you so much, and I hope our relationship continues to flourish from here. Yes, well, I love I love you too. Ciao.